Vaati And A Crazed Fangirl
by inkspl0tch
Summary: Vaati finds out that he has a fangirl after him, and this one isn't as ... shy as the others. He isn't sure whether to be confused, flattered, outraged, or just plain creeped out. But he does know, that he may be able to use this to his benefit.
1. Fake Out

**Hello peoples of the world. I have another idea for a story… Erm. Well… Kinda… I do have an idea, but a plot… I'm not so sure haha. So I'll go along with this idea, and see where it takes us. I'm trying to decide whether I want to write it like I did ****Nobody TV ****or if I want to write it normally, like I did ****Plunge To Nowhere. ****Seeing as I'm about to start typing the story, I better decide quickly!**

**While I'm thinking, I'll give you a quick rundown of the things I have figured out. Ok, obviously, it's about Zelda… It's set just after Minish Cap, but for story purposes we're gonna pretend Vaati never died (stupid Link … going and killing my love…) To make things, interesting, I'm adding an OC named Hoshiko (means child of the stars or something like that)! Ok. I guess I've got a decision to make. Leave me a review, not only about the story, but what you think the best way to put the story is. Alright, I'll quit taking up yours and my time with something half of the fanfiction population doesn't read, and I'll start. Enjoy?**

"I think he's finally dead…" Link sighed, wiping sweat from his brow. Ezlo wasn't so sure. Vaati, the object of many fangirls desires, was lying in a heap on the floor.

"I don't think so, Link! It was too easy!" Ezlo replied, and then muttered under his breath, "After all, you did it…"

"Hey! I heard that!" He had gone through many obstacles to get the element pieces, including a wild goose chase, so that he could save Zelda, yada yada yada. "Let's just get out of here while we can, and go save Zelda. I'm not gonna complain if some purple skinned so called "sorcerer" isn't all he's cracked up to be." Ezlo didn't disagree, so they headed over to go save Zelda.

Vaati lie still on the floor, he looked dead. But guess what? He wasn't! He found the peasant boy and Ezlo, his previous master, to be gullible. Of course, he was right. They had believed they killed him, and Vaati hadn't even showed off his other forms. How amusing.

While his previous plan wasn't as well thought out, he had the workings for another unexplainably evil scheme. Of course, to put this plan into action, he couldn't die. That was crucial. How can you conquer the world when you're dead?

Truthfully he hadn't expected to buy it that easy. But they did, and that's all that mattered.

-x-

Vaati later managed to escape Dark Hyrule Castle (the King had some major redecorating to do) later. To further help his advantage of seeming dead, he left a pile of ashes where he was lying. He watched with amusement in his eyes as Link fist pumped, and Ezlo smirked triumphantly… Well… smirked as well as he could with a beak. He'd never seen a bird smirk. Ezlo didn't do a very good demonstration of it. He wondered if regular birds could smirk.

Anyways, that's irrelevant. Step 2 in his plan was to head towards Royal Valley. Every good evil villain needed a permanent lair. While Hyrule Castle was his idea of a good lair, he could not reside there anymore.

A while back, he realized that his original evil scheme would not work as he wished. That's when he sent a bunch of underlings to go build him a castle. He handed them blue prints, and they were off. These weren't incompetent underlings, like the Chuchu, or even the moblins or Darknuts. He actually had a group of minish on his side. In exchange for their help, he turned them human size.

Royal Valley was an ideal place. It was dark and creepy, and not many people came there. There was the exception of Dampe, but he didn't particularly matter much. Besides, in the event that he posed an issue, he would be easy enough to dispose of. Heck, he might even be a good ally. Maybe.

He arrived in Royal Valley, and walking to the site he had wanted his Castle built, he smirked when he saw it. He had a thing for smirked. He was made aware of how sexy it made him look by the swooning fangirls. It was always nice to have fans.

The castle was built inconspicuously underground. Stick a special key in a hole in the rock, move it to the left, go down a flight of stairs, flick a switch to make sure the rock was put back and locked, then go down the dark corridor. Then bam, you're there. Of course, you had password to enter to get in. 2211209 was entered into the key pad, and the door opened.

Once he got in, he had just sat down, and planned on taking a nice warm bath when one of his minish servants came in.

"Um… sir…" she said sheepishly.

Vaati sighed, "What?"

"There's this girl here. She got past the rock and the door and everything. We have no idea how… but, she's demanding to see you."

And again… "What?"

**So maybe Vaati should realize that his extremely intricate security system was not so intricate at all. So what do you think? Any ideas? Suggestions? Let me know!**

**PS… To people who were following and of my others stories and such (Insane Chatrooms, Nobody TV, Plunge To Nowhere), I promise I will be updating soon. Ok? Thanks for reading!**


	2. The Crazed Fangirl

**RAAAHHH. No reviews, no feedback, I have no idea where to take this.. And I haven't updated this in so long I forgot what stuff I did know. This is bad. So I'll just make it up as I go along! Funny thing is, I've realized no one seems to like my stories when they're typed out like this. Amiright? Oh well, I shall type the story now x'3**

"We have no idea how she got in here. But she infiltrated all security and everything…" he said.

Vaati sighed, closing his eyes. "Send her in here." he ordered, mentally face palming.

The Minish servant exited the room, and a few seconds later came back with a girl who seemed to be about 17. She had long brown hair with sideswept purple bangs, blue eyes, dark eye make up, and wore skinny jeans, converse, and a band tee. In other words, she was a typical fan girl. And Vaati noticed this as soon as she walked in. So he decided to perform a test to check her level of fan girl rabid-ness. And whether or not he was safe to be alone with her.

"What is your name?" Vaati said in the nicest tone he could, forcing out a smile. It is, as it turns out, extremely difficult to be nice to someone who broke into your hideout- especially when you thought the security was fool proof.

Her smile widens, as she tries to cool it. In her head, she couldn't think straight. Fortunately, her outside demeanor reflected the opposite of her thoughts.

"Hoshiko! It'!" she says. Okay, well… It was still nothing like the jumbled thoughts inside her head.

Vaati once again, sighs. "Tell me… do you like Yaoi?"

"Yowwie?" asks the Minish servant. Vaati waves him off, looking at Hoshiko for a response.

"Ew, yaoi. I especially hate it when they pair you up with Link." she replies, sticking her tongue out.

Vaati visibly relaxes. If she doesn't like yaoi, then she must not be too rabid, and therefore safe, at least, at the moment. But then he cringes again, thinking of the time he saw VaatixLink yaoi hentai. He hasn't been the same since.

Looking at the Minish servant, he gestures to the door. "You are dismissed." he says formally. The Minish servant exits, leaving Vaati and Hoshiko alone.

Then to Hoshiko, "Sit. We have a lot to… discuss." So they both sit down at a table and chairs, sitting across from each other.


	3. She's Been Watching You

… **I have no idea where I was going with this when I was originally writing it. But whatever, plots aren't .. important or anything.. Crap. ~**

Vaati's main room was very nice. Where they were now, there was a desk and chairs on one side of the room, with a couch television on the other side. There were 3 doors, one leading out, the other presumably leading to his bedroom and bathroom. He had minish do the cooking for him, so there was no need for a kitchen in his quarters.

Right now, he sat at his desk with his head resting against his palm. Hoshinko watched him, casually bouncing her legs up and down and tapping her hands on the chair arms.

"Okay. Why. Why. No, before that, **how**? How did you get in here? The security was flawless, or so I thought. I oversaw them putting in the security system. Where did you get the key at? How did you know which rock? HOW DID YOU KNOW THE SECURITY KEY?" Vaati raged, his hair flying up slightly around him. This surprised Hoshinko, given that until now he had been cool and collected.

Before she could respond, he sighed, "Hoshinko, correct?"

"You can call me Hoshi for short!" she beamed, bouncing back quickly for someone who had just been yelled at by their idol.

"Alright, Hoshi…" he replied, holding back a gag. Her sunny personality was repulsive to him. "I apologize for snapping at you. However, you must understand that it's rather frustrating to me how you found your way in here."

She nods at him. Of course.

He sighs. It'd be so much easier just to throw her into the dungeon he'd had made as well. But he can't do that, not yet. First he needs to figure out how she got in. And he's seen her type before, he could will it out of her easier just by talking to her, torturing it out of her would be significantly less effective. So he'd get it out of her, and just as soon as she did, he'd lock her away, problem solved forever.

"Why don't you start by telling me how you got in?" he said, as calmly as possible.

"Well… As your minish were building this place, I suppose they may have taken a lunch break or something. I'm not sure. Anyways, before they walked off, I saw them hide something under a rock. Before you get mad, please realize that I'm sure they thought it was safe as it seemed nobody was around," she smiled, "So, when they walked away, I got curious and went to see what they had hidden, heh, imagine my surprise when I found a key…"

So far her story checks out. A look of horror crosses his face, but he hides it just as quickly, she didn't catch it. Before they finished his castle, one of his minish approached him and told him that they had lost one of the keys, saying something along the lines of a crow taking it beyond their reach. Of course this annoyed him, but what other choice did he have but to make another key for them? He already had his own, so he just copied it, thinking it was likely lost forever.

He had the oddest headache coming on right now.

"So, that explains how you got the key. Keep going."

"Well, I'm friends with Dampe…" she'd known him for a while now. One day she was walking around, for lack of something better to do. Why Royal Valley? Why not? Nobody ever came through there, it was quiet, and calm.. If you watched out for the ghini. And even then those were fairly harmless. But seeing her surprised Dampe so much, they started talking. He was a peculiar old guy, but still pretty cool.

"I was out here visiting him that day. I got intensely curious about the Royal Valley. I started coming by to visit him more often. I spent more time here, watching the minish come and go. It wasn't that hard. And THEN…" at this, her eyes gain some strange otherworldly sparkle, that only intense fan girls get in extreme times of happiness, "Then, I heard them say your name. Something like, 'Lord Vaati is going to be here soon, we need to hurry and finish.' .. OH MY GOSH I WAS SO EXCITED I CAN'T EVEN! See, I've known about you for a while. But that's another story. My curiosity changed to passion, obsession. I had to find a way in and make contact with you. So I watched them come in and out of that rock stair case thing. Once I decided to follow them. And it's dark down there, so as long as I was quiet, they never knew I was there. So I followed them down there, learned the way. And watched them put in the pass code. It really wasn't too hard," she smiled, really happy. She was proud of herself.

Vaati had used the minish hoping that they would be smarter than the rest of his underlings. While they had done well, building his intricate castle, they weren't smart enough to realize that this.. This girl, this simple girl with nothing better to do than stalk someone, easily just walked right in. That frustrated him greatly.

Hoshi sat there while he thought, tapping her fingers against the chair arms and still bouncing her legs up and down. This began to annoy Vaati.

"For the love of everything Holy, STOP!" he burst.

She didn't stop, "Can't. Sorry."

He stared. "Why is that?"

"I get anxious, and that's what I do. I can't stop, even if I try."

He sighed again, "Fine. I need some time to think this over, I'll have one of the minish take you to a room and I'll talk to you tomorrow…"

"Do you want to take a bath to calm down? I'll run the bath for you and even come with you and help you wash and stuff..~" she said, winking at him.

Vaati could not contain his blush, as his eyes widened. "GUARD!" he yelled, catching Hoshi laugh a bit.

Two guards rushed in. "Take her." Vaati said to the first. The first guard grabbed her arm and led her out of the room.

"Take her to the guest chambers, but DO NOT let her leave. Don't let her out of your sight till she gets to her room, guard her door, lock it, whatever, but DO NOT LET HER LEAVE. Am I clear?" Vaati said to the second guard.

The minish guard nodded, then left to follow the first guard.

Vaati sighed, and leaned his head down on the desk. He wasn't cut out for dealing with fan girls.


End file.
